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So this one time, I don't know how we came up with the idea, but we decided to put pop rocks in our mouths and go down on each other. Felt great, but cleaning up crusty red sugar from your crotch is not fun. That's my story.

So this one time, My girlfriend was going down on me. As she went as low as she could go my pubic hair tickled her nose and she sneezed. Now I have two permanent teeth marks and a girlfriend who refuses to try again. That's my story.

Again, I found out the hard way that my "waterproof" vibrator is anything but. That's my story.

So this one time, my wife and I were having sex. My wife says with a strange look on her face that she feels something strange between her legs. We ignore it, but a few minutes later I am shocked to have a similar sensation on my balls. My stupid cat thought that would be a good time to stick her sandpaper tongue on them. That's my story.

So this one time, I was down in Mexico for fun and looked lost. A tour guide introduced himself to us by asking us, "Do you want some discount p***y?". Needless to say I came back with a few souvenirs. . . . one of them required a prescription. That's my story.

So this one time, I went down on my girlfriend and found out the hard way why girls are 'supposed' to wipe front to back first. That's my story.

So this one time, yeah me and my wife were doing the old missionary position. when suddenly out of no where comes this (what feels like) ice cube enema. apparently our 6 month old puppy had gotten a little curious as to what all the commotion was about and had to stick his nose in the middle of my business. That's my story.

So this one time, my boyfriend told me he had nightmares about sex with me. That's my story.

So this one time, My girlfriend made me go with her to buy a pregnancy test. I agreed and said I had to pick something up as well. You get a lot of funny looks buying a pregnancy test and wire coat hangers at the same time. That's my story.

So this one time, My new girlfriend talked me into having sex on top of my roof. She really got into it and was saying that it was the best sex ever. All I could think of was "Don't fall off. Don't fall off." That's my story.

So this one time, I don't know how we came up with the idea, but we decided to put pop rocks in our mouths and go down on each other. Felt great, but cleaning up crusty red sugar from your crotch is not fun. That's my story.

So this one time, I was home sick and my boyfriend said he would bring me chicken soup. I thought he was the greatest when he came over and then agreed to lay in bed watching a movie with me. This lead to us having sex. Immediatly afterward he said "Thanks" and just left! He admitted later to coming over for the sex and chicken soup was just his way in. That's my story.

Again, my girlfriend went down on me, but this time she asked me if I wanted a snow ball. I had no clue that meant she would keep my load in her mouth and spit it back in mine when she kissed me. I was more than a little suprised to taste my own salty flavor. That's my story.

So this one time, I was with a guy I'd been seeing and I knew he was into some "different" stuff. All of a sudden, he starts to choke me, which I'd never done before. As I started to struggle for air, he whispers in my ear, "Don't worry, I'm a medical technician." I didn't talk to him for awhile after that. It took two weeks for the bruises on my neck to go away. That's my story.

So this one time, me and my bf decided to go at it on an inflatable bed we were using as a couch for the last time before my new roommate moved in and moved it to her room. Apparently he left a little stain on the bed because my roommate came out and said "I found a little piece of white stuff on the bed... I licked it and it tasted salty. It must be some of that ice-melting salt from outside." Me and my bf busted up laughing... we still haven't told her what it really was. That's my story.

So this one time, I was sitting in my room in front of my laptop pleasuring myself. I was at it for a good 10 minutes, and when that time came I pointed it a bit back (to avoid getting it on my laptop) and it shot straight up all over my face and chest. It got in my eyes, so when it happened I screamed a little bit (it scared the hell out of me) and fell out of my chair. The worst part of it all my mother came rushing in during the clean up, movie still going and everything, thinking I had hurt myself. That's my story.

Again, masturbating and finished in a tube sock. Some friends came over and we all agreed to go out. Grabbed my wallet, keys, and threw on one clean sock and my recently used sock. I didn't want to say what I just did so I just put my shoes on and went on like nothing happened. That's my story.

So this one time, I had to pick up my daughter early from school because they were naming animals that had tails at school. She exclaimed, "Frogs don't have tails but my dad has a pink one in front of him." She had evidentally walked in on us. That's my story.

So this one time, I tried so hard to impress this guy on our initial bedroom meeting. Nervous and sweaty I decided to ask him if he wanted a massage. I got the baby oil and began to anxiously squirt with the plastic seal half way on. Suddenly I showered it in his face (imagine a bottle of oil dripping down your face), boy was I embarrased I was better off saying, "Look Im clumpsy and shy let's just get in the shower and I'll drop soap"! That's my story.